It's About Time!
I thought Eric would never get around to kissing Jessica! I think they're a really cute shomance.
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
Saturday, August 25, 2007
More on the Lovely Perez and Fidel
OK. People who believe that Sources reveal exclusively to PerezHilton.com that U.S. officials will be holding a press conference shortly to announce the death of Cuban dictator Fidel Castro, deserve to be made fun of. I'm sorry, but, c'mon people. These "sources" said "Castro is dead. We should call CNN. No. Let's call Perez Hilton!"
But, I suppose, when Castro finally does die, Perez will be able to say he scooped everyone. So, next year, in two years, five years, or whenever Castro dies, Perez can say "See? I told you on August 17, 2007!"
And, I know I'm far from the first person to have said this but ... C'mon everyone ... in your best Chevy Chase Weekend Update voice ... "But Generalissimo Francisco Franco is still dead."
OK. People who believe that Sources reveal exclusively to PerezHilton.com that U.S. officials will be holding a press conference shortly to announce the death of Cuban dictator Fidel Castro, deserve to be made fun of. I'm sorry, but, c'mon people. These "sources" said "Castro is dead. We should call CNN. No. Let's call Perez Hilton!"
But, I suppose, when Castro finally does die, Perez will be able to say he scooped everyone. So, next year, in two years, five years, or whenever Castro dies, Perez can say "See? I told you on August 17, 2007!"
And, I know I'm far from the first person to have said this but ... C'mon everyone ... in your best Chevy Chase Weekend Update voice ... "But Generalissimo Francisco Franco is still dead."
Friday, August 24, 2007
PUH-LEEEEEZ!!!!!
You don't think he's trying to get a little extra pub a few weeks before his new reality show starts airing, do ya?
Nahhhh!
You don't think he's trying to get a little extra pub a few weeks before his new reality show starts airing, do ya?
Nahhhh!
Thursday, August 16, 2007
Dumb, Dumber, Dumbest
I'm sure you've all seen and heard of the dumb warning labels that are on certain products. Here are a few of my favorites.
Sleeping Pills: Warning: May cause Drowsiness
Camera : This camera will only work when film is inside.
Credit card statement: Payment is due by the due date
Well, I started thinking about this last night when I was checking food packaging for allergy information (since I can't have wheat/gluten anymore). A can of mixed nuts has the warning: May contain nuts. (I'm payin' 4 bucks for it. It damn well better have nuts in it!) A package of cheese: Contains milk. (Uh, duh!) Then when I was at Dumb.com just now, I saw this one: Container of salt: Warning: High in sodium.
Kinda makes you feel bad for the packagers/label makers who are forced to put this stuff on the labels because some people are so D-U-M-B!!
I'm sure you've all seen and heard of the dumb warning labels that are on certain products. Here are a few of my favorites.
Sleeping Pills: Warning: May cause Drowsiness
Camera : This camera will only work when film is inside.
Credit card statement: Payment is due by the due date
Well, I started thinking about this last night when I was checking food packaging for allergy information (since I can't have wheat/gluten anymore). A can of mixed nuts has the warning: May contain nuts. (I'm payin' 4 bucks for it. It damn well better have nuts in it!) A package of cheese: Contains milk. (Uh, duh!) Then when I was at Dumb.com just now, I saw this one: Container of salt: Warning: High in sodium.
Kinda makes you feel bad for the packagers/label makers who are forced to put this stuff on the labels because some people are so D-U-M-B!!
Monday, August 13, 2007
Fate Brought You Here!
Why do I say that? Because I'm raising money for the MDA (Jerry's Kids) and you can help me. Just CLICK HERE to find out how. Thank you for helping me help Jerry's Kids!
Why do I say that? Because I'm raising money for the MDA (Jerry's Kids) and you can help me. Just CLICK HERE to find out how. Thank you for helping me help Jerry's Kids!
Sunday, August 12, 2007
Words
Believe me, I have a hard time putting a sentence together sometimes but, because it's my job, I try my best. When I was in college and, actually, when I started working at the newspaper, I was taught to read my stories out loud to make sure they made sense. Now, because it's my job to read them out loud, that's a lot easier to do ... and it makes my job a lot easier. Anyway, as I was reading a story in the newspaper about a local festival that is requiring people to buy tickets to be used at food booths, I could pretty much guarantee that this newspaper writer did not read this sentence out loud:
"Tickets will be used to purchase food instead of cash."
Believe me, I have a hard time putting a sentence together sometimes but, because it's my job, I try my best. When I was in college and, actually, when I started working at the newspaper, I was taught to read my stories out loud to make sure they made sense. Now, because it's my job to read them out loud, that's a lot easier to do ... and it makes my job a lot easier. Anyway, as I was reading a story in the newspaper about a local festival that is requiring people to buy tickets to be used at food booths, I could pretty much guarantee that this newspaper writer did not read this sentence out loud:
"Tickets will be used to purchase food instead of cash."
Saturday, August 11, 2007
Classic TV?
Remember when Nick-at-Nite and TV Land first started. It was so cool to see all those old tv shows -- Patty Duke, Dick VanDyke, even the Partridge Family. So, um, call me dense, but what makes Extreme Makeover: Home Edition classic tv? It's still on network tv! And, for that matter, isn't America's Funniest Home Videos still on network tv? I don't understand. Or, maybe they're looking for a younger demographic and I'm just too old. I guess that would serve me right for thinking what I think when senior citizens tell me they don't listen to our radio station because of the music. (AM is AC and FM is "high energy rockin oldies") I always want to say to them -- "We don't care if you listen or not. You're not in our demographic." By the way, two words I never thought I'd use in a sentence are "our demographic."
Remember when Nick-at-Nite and TV Land first started. It was so cool to see all those old tv shows -- Patty Duke, Dick VanDyke, even the Partridge Family. So, um, call me dense, but what makes Extreme Makeover: Home Edition classic tv? It's still on network tv! And, for that matter, isn't America's Funniest Home Videos still on network tv? I don't understand. Or, maybe they're looking for a younger demographic and I'm just too old. I guess that would serve me right for thinking what I think when senior citizens tell me they don't listen to our radio station because of the music. (AM is AC and FM is "high energy rockin oldies") I always want to say to them -- "We don't care if you listen or not. You're not in our demographic." By the way, two words I never thought I'd use in a sentence are "our demographic."
Airplane!-like Alex-isms
My nephew is 6 and, as far as anyone knows, he has never seen the movie "Airplane!." And, if he has, would he understand it? But this makes you wonder:
Toward the end of the last school year, he came home and was taking things out of his back pack. He showed my sister a prize he won -- a bookmark. My sister asked what it was for, meaning the prize. But he said "It's to put in your book so you don't lose your place."
While I was visiting them last week, Alex told me he got stung by a bee last year. I asked where the bee stung him. He pointed and said "Right over there in the yard."
Then, last week, his younger brother asked why a certain club is called the Hoot-n-Holler. Alex points and answers "Because of that sign right there."
PS: Lest you think the child is a bit slow -- I hesitate to call him a smart ass because he's only 6, so I'll call him a smart aleck, or smart alex, as the case may be. My sister said that their 5-year-old was asking her and her husband where "that red thing" was and he just kept bugging them, and bugging them and bugging them about it. Finally, my sister said "Alex, do you know what he's talking about?" Alex said "Yeah. He wants to know where that red thing is."
My nephew is 6 and, as far as anyone knows, he has never seen the movie "Airplane!." And, if he has, would he understand it? But this makes you wonder:
Toward the end of the last school year, he came home and was taking things out of his back pack. He showed my sister a prize he won -- a bookmark. My sister asked what it was for, meaning the prize. But he said "It's to put in your book so you don't lose your place."
While I was visiting them last week, Alex told me he got stung by a bee last year. I asked where the bee stung him. He pointed and said "Right over there in the yard."
Then, last week, his younger brother asked why a certain club is called the Hoot-n-Holler. Alex points and answers "Because of that sign right there."
PS: Lest you think the child is a bit slow -- I hesitate to call him a smart ass because he's only 6, so I'll call him a smart aleck, or smart alex, as the case may be. My sister said that their 5-year-old was asking her and her husband where "that red thing" was and he just kept bugging them, and bugging them and bugging them about it. Finally, my sister said "Alex, do you know what he's talking about?" Alex said "Yeah. He wants to know where that red thing is."